Ya know, when I share some things that I've been turning over in my brain for a few weeks...did you think I meant the holidays?
1) I wonder if when I write an email to BB and sign it fakely upbeat and use lots of "!!!!" if he reads the "fuck you" in it that I've passive aggressively intended to convey.
2) Standing burns more calories than sitting. If you are fat enough that you take up more than one seat on the subway and it's rush hour, you should be standing for a multitude of reasons.
3) I'm seeing my first opera tonight: Carmen. I signed up for this before I knew it was 3 1/2 hours long, started at 8PM, and was in French. (I know all of this should have been obvious but I just saaaaaid it was my first opera!) I keep having panic attacks that I'll be like Elaine watching The English Patient.
4) My dentist canceled my appointment today stating a "family emergency". I found this interesting as WE are family and I've yet to hear about anything urgent...Do you think he's using my "I'm really just hungover" excuse?
5) This time of year, food is out of control at my office. And I hate-- HATE-- when I pass up a cupcake or cookie or brownie because I just plain don't want it or am not hungry and then everyone has to chime in with "Oh come on!" or "Oh sure, that's how you stay so thin..." Um, yes. Yes it is how I stay thin. It might not kill any of you to skip a snack either, but somehow it's only OK for you to make inappropriate comments about MY weight because it's less than yours.
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